We chose to share.
A lot of adoptive families do not share their journey and open their lives up for the public to view. They have some good and valid reasons for doing so and I completely respect them for that decision.
I, however, always knew we would share for a slew of reasons.
Most importantly, we hope that by allowing people to watch this process, they will be able to see the way God is working all this out. It’s not easy to walk away from your comfort zone and follow to God’s purpose for your life, but when you do, He holds your hand with every step. We hope that by sharing, people will see that we didn’t do anything, but rather God orchestrated EVERYTHING.
I also have a love/hate relationship with social media. It’s my job, so I love that aspect. There is so much good if you follow it, and I love that too. There’s support if you’re looking in the right places. But it can also be nasty and hateful and dishonest and dangerous. The truth is though, God started me on this path by showing me special needs orphans on social media, through others who had adopted, advocated, and shared. We are here because someone else (several someones) shared, and I certainly hope to pay that forward by sharing as well.
And in that, I hope that another adoptive family will see the process and know that totally ordinary people can do this, and maybe it won’t be so overwhelming.
Finally, I share because there are children dying slow horrific deaths alone in cribs and people need to know. My family, my husband, my friends, my dentist, my co-workers, MYSELF…none of us knew how orphans with special needs are treated in some countries until another person SHARED and opened our eyes. We didn’t know, but now we do, and since we do, we can (and should) do something!
I feel a responsibility to share, whether it’s self-imposed responsibility or not.
Mostly, it’s been wonderful. The support people have shown us is extraordinary. The kindness is refreshing and overwhelming. The new friends we’ve made are treasured.
But there have also been moments.
Opening up your life, your finances, and your family to others sometimes opens the door for comments and questions people wouldn’t normally speak out loud to you.
I left a career at 39 years old.
We chose to adopt internationally instead of from the United States.
We are choosing to bring a medically complex child into our home.
We’ve made financial sacrifices.
I plan to homeschool my youngest children.
All of these things are not typically considered “normal” and the sharing of them invites opinions, including those who think you are making a mistake or should be choosing differently. It has come from family, from friends, from acquaintances and from strangers.
And while it’s sometimes hard, and it sometimes hurts, it really is ok.
It’s a consequence of sharing that I figured we’d face, but to me, it’s worth it if even one person sees God working through this journey and through everyone who is walking along side us, if only one person’s eyes are opened to the heartbreaking realities special needs orphans face, if only one person feels something in them stir toward adoption, or if only one person decides to share for themselves.
We won’t ever know really, if sharing made a positive difference for anyone but ourselves, but I’d still do it for the hope of reaching someone. Even if it were only one. Because when I think about it, the person who first shared and reached me, won’t ever know the impact that post had or the way it changed the entire path of our lives. For the better!
So here is our latest update:
~ Our Rummage Sale Fundraiser is happening in two days! There are so many people who have stepped up to help us with set up tomorrow and to bake things for the Bake Sale (little J even got in on the baking fun!). We’re in awe! This will likely be our last big fundraiser and we will reassess where we are with funding once it’s over.
~ We are still waiting on our Home Study. It came to us for edits and went back. It went to our adoption agency for edits and went back. I was hopeful that the next stop would be our mail box, but now, they are working out some wording and questions from our adoption agency before it goes back to them for review. I won’t lie, I was disappointed because I had put it in my head that we might be getting the final copies this week and that isn’t going to happen.
~ We do have EVERYTHING else ready to go, and when the Home Study is finalized, we’ll be able to start our USCIS paperwork. Right now it’s taking around 90 days if there are no errors or requests for more information. It’s not the timeline we were wanting, but it is the one God’s giving us, so we’re trying to rest in the faith that there is a reason for this wait.
~ Aside from those things, I’m going to really start working on his room after the Rummage Sale is over. I desperately need to be making some progress or I feel a little stir crazy.
Love to you all!
Adoption Links:
🧡 Facebook: www.facebook.com/LoveWorthy2018
🧡 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/loveworthy18/
🧡 e-mail: loveworthy18@gmail.com
The Other Side of Fear 